Six Habits to Transform Your Year

A clean slate once again! What a perfect time to put the past behind us and embrace our full potential as creative directors of our lives.

To help create a year you'll love, consider the following tips and techniques to transform your 2008. Choose one you haven't mastered yet and enjoy!

1. Breathe

Letting oxygen in to fill the lungs is not only good for physical health, but for your emotional and spiritual health as well. We feel better and think better when our cells are fully oxygenated. Some say it's because oxygen strengthens our connection to source energy.

Next time you don't know what to do or feel overwhelmed with challenging emotions, take a couple of deep breaths and let the peace (and solutions) in, while releasing the stress. Oxygen is both invigorating and cleansing.

2. Feel

Since our feelings dictate what we attract, it's important to be aware of and manage them. Many of us have learned to ignore or deny our feelings for various reasons. Being disconnected to our feelings is to be disconnected to our creative power. Ancient spiritual traditions, as well as leading edge science, tells us our feelings dictate what manifests in our lives. Getting clear on what we're feeling and learning to choose them deliberately allows us to be deliberate manifestors.

Learn to let yourself feel your feelings. Notice where in your body the feeling sensations reside. Imagine going to the core of the essence of that energy - the very center of it - and then just be present to it. Sit with it and let yourself feel what's there until it dissipates.
This simple but profound practice frees us from negative behaviors many engage in (overeating, overworking, and other addictive behaviors) to keep from feeling.

3. Be Still

Embrace the habit of slowing down. Becoming present to the current moment creates space for magic to happen. When our lives are crammed full of "reality" and our knee jerk reactions to it, we have neither the discipline nor the capability of directing our attention where it best serves us.

Beginning a meditation practice can be as easy as Elizabeth Gilbert's (author of "Eat, Pray, Love") mentor taught her: simply sit and smile for a few minutes each day. You'll notice a difference when you do.

There are a variety of ways to explore internal peace and quiet. However you approach the practice, the journey is well rewarded.

4. Focus

Want to really blow the socks off your new year? Cultivate a focus on what's working in your life and what's truly important to you. Get used to looking at what's going your way, things to appreciate, and reasons to be thankful. Since we get what we think about, as we direct our attention on what we want and enjoy (instead of worrying about what we don't want or what went wrong before), we allow our deepest desires to manifest.

Although it takes a little practice, the energy invested in this pursuit pays off handsomely. In the very least, as Meister Eckhart said, "If the only prayer you said in your whole life was 'thank you,' that would suffice."

5. Let Go

There comes a time we're called to release old patterns, friendships, lifestyles, thoughts, etc. When that time comes, honor it. New things and experiences can't enter our lives while we've got a death grip on the old. Learn to trust your intuition and doubt your fear, and let go of what no longer serves you.

Also, one of the most powerful ways to transform your year is to release your attachment to outcome. What we really want isn't so much a particular outcome anyway. Rather, what we really want is how we think that outcome will make us feel. You can, in fact, choose that feeling now, before anything else happens.

6. Have Fun

We Americans are particularly driven by ambition and the push to succeed, often at the expense of enjoying the journey. Let's not forget the bigger picture. Suffering doesn't serve anyone.

Sometimes we think it's wrong to enjoy life when so many others aren't, or when there is so much work to correct our "faltering" world. The truth is that suffering doesn't serve anyone - not you, not others, and certainly not the cause we feel so passionate about. We're offering our best service when we feel good.

Know that when you "push against" something, you strengthen it. That in itself is reason enough to relinquish suffering. There's nothing to prove and no hoops to jump through in order to be worthy of reward. So relax and relish!

Finally, you know more than you think you do. Remember to trust yourself and lighten up to savor the journey. Enjoy your new year as if it were impossible to go wrong, because indeed, it is. Happy 2008!

It's Not You, (Really) It's Me

Holy Hannah - sometimes I freak myself out! I just flipped through my notebook for a client quote to include in this new post I was going to write, and happened to run across the list I made a few months ago of what I wanted in my next web developer.

I just now realized the person I hired last month is all that AND a bag of chips!! I mean, to read this page and a half list of traits including:

• personable
• so knowledgeable
• great reputation
• very responsive
• proactive
• supportive
• tactful
• great new ideas
• 'gets' me
• loves animals
• refers perfect clients my way
• teaches me
• gives extra value
• is fun to work with
• easy to understand
• goes the extra mile
• appreciates my business

... I mean I go on and on. You'd think I was ordering up the impossible!! Or at least the very unlikely!

But here she is in real living life - working on MY site & blog. (& ecourse. I'm getting her in on that ecourse someday, too.)

I got exactly what I wanted. It's freaky! Even after all this time, it still amazes me how we get just what we ask for. In REALLY strange ways!! (If she gives me the good word to share her contact info, I'm all over it.)

WOW.

I had one majorly screwed up vibe on web people for a while. After my fourth service provider, I realized - hello - it's not them; it's me. So before I hired my fifth person I knew I had some cleaning up to do.

Which I've been aware of all year long. I was easy on myself for this work. I didn't require overnight change; rather gave myself plenty of time to develop a new expectation and thought pattern about web people.

Which is also why my site doesn't give a link to this blog - that's how long I've been out a web person.

(What are they really called? It's probably not "web person." Sorry, web people! Web designer? Web maintainer? Web expert? I don't know.)

Anyway, I'm officially proclaiming myself free and clear of that old vibe, and LOVING the new one I've got going!! WOO HOO!!

Does that mean everything will go perfectly from here on out? Well, probably, but I'm not going to be flustered if it doesn't. Sometimes there are bumps in the road; that's fine, it won't cause me careening off the path if we hit one.

Okay, I'll get back to the post I was really going to type up.

Before I go, let me ask what vibe are you cleaning up? Have you got one that consistently delivers what you don't want? Maybe you get incompetent wait service or ..

... oh, stop me now! lol ... I was just about to list a whole bunch of possibilities of what we might have bad vibes on. (No need to activate THAT.)

You are spared!

Bottom line, if you've got a subject that consistently brings trauma or drama to your life, consider perhaps it's not them - but rather your vibe that's responsible. Let them off the hook, clean up your vibe, and move on to the good stuff. It's all waiting there for us when we just take the time to get aligned. : )

Swift vs Struggling Manifesting

To be fair to all the male creators out there (who read my October 23rd ezine with the genders showing the swift creator as female and the struggling creator as male), I'm giving you your due:

Swift Creator:

Believes what he wants is possible
Willing to try
Gives himself credit where he can
Practices what he learns
Is open and trusting
Doesn't hinge his wellbeing on the outcome
Feels connected to the world and others
Easily finds something to appreciate
Leaves the past in the past
Open to guidance (from higher self and others)

Struggling Creator:

Doubts it's possible; fear it's not
Fears disappointment
Sees failure instead of progress
Doesn't give it a chance to work
Is "shut down" and suspicious
Everything depends on a positive outcome
Feels isolated and alone
Sees little to be grateful for
Feels compelled to analyze what went wrong in the past
Closed to guidance from self and others

Hope that feels better. I actually understand how offensive that may have been for some to read, as I couldn't bring myself to use "she" or "her" in describing the struggling creator here.

My sincerest apologies!!

And a clarification in the same issue: my ecology professor (in fact, my high school ecology teacher, too) in college is inspiring because of his enthusiasm and love for his field of work. I rarely meet others so engaged and in love with what they do. Which is why he's my model for joy and passion.

(See guys, my ecology professor/hero was male ... !!) : )

Seriously, the simple fact is that most of us show up in both lists at one time or another. Which is fine. That's how we work. It's not unusual and it doesn't make us bad or wrong or incompetent.

What I like is for us to be aware of where we're holding ourselves back in order to free ourselves from habits that don't serve.

Awareness is the first step.

So, along those lines: I'm willing to try to help and believe that I can (and am). I give myself lots of credit (in fact, the "thank you" emails outnumbered the "what were you thinking" emails 9 to 1, so thanks to those of you who give me credit, too). I'm practicing what I know every day (and doing so in this post now), am open to correction and new learning, I'm feeling the love for and from those I'm in this go-round with, loving life in general and appreciating that people read and think enough of what I've written to write back!

And with that said I'm off to write a new post that's been on my mind for a few days.

Thanks for being here! You likely have no idea how much you mean to me! : )

Work Wanted

I liked this story from my girlfriend Anne so much, I asked her permission to share it.

She's been on the job hunt for a couple months now. After joining her boyfriend in California last year, she burned through a couple of different positions that for one reason or another weren't right for her. She's been out of work now for several weeks, and is getting unnerved by her extended unemployment.

Anne wrote the other day, saying she's been searching job listings, sending out resumes, writing cover letters, reviewing web sites, trying to line up interviews, all to no avail. She was frustrated, to say the least.

Her note to me said she recognized she was "needing" this new job, and knew from an LOA perspective that that was keeping it from her. So she was going to work on "believing" it.

But before she got around to that she decided to give herself a break and go see her favorite band perform live. Her boyfriend took her, and even though he's not nearly the fan she is, he stayed for entire concert and they had a really good time. (She's such a big fan that her personal email address is the band's name, and she's travelled the country to see them live! I mean, the band members know her name!)

Can you guess what happens next?

The very next day she got four messages. Three from employers asking to set up interviews, one asking her to come in that same day.

So now she's feeling in "high demand" and her whole vibration is turned around.

What a difference a day makes, huh? Especially a day that includes us doing something that feels fabulous!

You know as well as I do that lots of folks would have given her advice about how to "make it happen" in her job hunt. They'd counsel her to work her network, beef up her resume, or take some other conventional action to make herself more desirable to prospective employers.

Not too many "experts" would suggest a night out with her favorite band for the solution to getting a job.

But that's often exactly what shifts the energy - doing what feels good. Which is what allows our escrow to squeak through our "real life" door.

Congrats, girlfriend, on letting the Universe do some of the heavy lifting. And I know since you pre-paved this next job that it will be a keeper!

PS - that's not say that taking real life conventional action doesn't make a difference in getting what we want. For lots of people, that "real life conventional action" is what shifts the energy, right? We do what we "believe" will work, and that believing is sometimes exactly what creates our vibrational alignment.

It's just a matter of finding your way to what feels best to you. :)

Scripting Miracles

(This is the Scripting story I promised Martha in the Pray Rain Journaling post:)

Once upon a time I was in a lifeless job and dead end relationship. The only love I had in life was volunteering as a foster mom for animal rescue groups.

But my misery in my work and love life bled into my passion, which soon contributed to my first (and I like to think only) nervous breakdown.

For various reasons I'll spare you details on, I had eight big dogs in my 850 sq ft house. EIGHT. That's a lot of canines. (I also had cats and a boyfriend. It was a full house.) Sometimes that might sound fun, but after three months it was NOT. Five dogs were up for adoption, and I was breaking new records in the rescue community for length of time without an adoption.

Every weekend we hauled dogs to the adoption fair, and every weekend they came back home.

To my overcrowded unhappy home.

One hot August day I was scooping poop in the backyard when I realized I couldn't scoop poop any more, because there was no grass left. (I loved grass. And it was gone because of the high dog traffic in the hot summer.) The poop wouldn't scoop. It just rolled along in the dirt as I tried to scoop it. It was my breaking point.

I threw the pooper scooper in one direction (it landed on the garage roof) and the bag of poop in another (landed in the neighbor's bushes), and I went to bed for four days.

Which is when I read Adrian Calabrese's "How to Get Everything You Ever Wanted."

Now this girl was truly strange. She wanted me to set up sacred space and burn incense and weird stuff like that. It was very "out there" to me.

But before I could put the book away, I knew I would have to do at least one thing in it. Just to say that I did.

The least strange thing was Scripting.

Where you talk out loud about what you want as if you already have it.

So I did that. I came out of the bedroom Thursday night. I said to my boyfriend, "This is going to sound crazy. But just listen."

(He had seen my poop flinging moment four days prior and knew I was hanging on to a very thin rope. He didn't say a word.)

I started "scripting."

"Isn't it great how Jeff"(our hardest to adopt dog - I didn't name him, by the way) ... "Isn't it great how Jeff got adopted by that nice couple. That husband and wife. Who have two kids. And a dog. A dog for Jeff to play with. And how they live nearby."

(This story chokes me up every time I tell it.)

"They live nearby, so we can visit him whenever we want. And they have plenty of money, so we know they'll take care of whatever needs he has."

"Yeah, isn't that great?"

It was a fairly lifeless script.

But from the dark place I was coming from, it was the best I could do. It was two minutes tops.

I went back to bed.

Saturday morning Verrall drove the dogs back to the same adoption fair he'd been taking them for the past three months.

An hour later we got a phone call from Trish, who ran the event. "You guys have to get over here RIGHT NOW."

I was sick. I knew the only reason they call that early is because your dog is either sick, misbehaving, or there's no room for him. No one gets adopted that fast. And I needed them to be there all weekend. I couldn't make it another week with these dogs. I knew it. I didn't have it in me.

SOMEONE needed to get adopted. It just wasn't optional that we go another week without an adoption.

But Trish went on ...

"There are two families over here fighting over Jeff. And I don't know who to give him to!!!!"

Okay, that didn't compute. I didn't understand. This had never happened.

Verrall drove us to the adoption fair. I walked in. There stood two families on either side of Jeff. Two couples, with their two kids, and their one dog. I read their applications. Perfect. You know how often that happens? Never.

We usually have to take a dozen apps before we find someone we'd even consider adopting to. And this was two perfect apps within one hour of the first day of the adoption fair!

I handed the paperwork back, turned around, and went back to sit in the car. I was in a stupor. I couldn't believe it.

It was just like I said. TWICE. Two families! With their two kids! And their dog!! Living close by!!

It had happened! Jeff, whom no one ever even LOOKED at in the three prior months, was being argued over by two perfect families!!

And the next day Oakley got adopted, too. To an absolutely amazing guy with the patience of a saint who owned a crazy dog who needed a crazy friend.

Two adoptions in one weekend after a three month dry spell!!

I doubt you can imagine my relief.

Scripting. I was hooked!

From that moment on, I read everything I could get my hands on about law of attraction. Which wasn't much back then. I didn't even know that's what it was called. (This was before "The Secret" and "Ask And It Is Given.")

And I couldn't stop talking about it. Anyone talked to me about their problem, I was telling them about this great thing I just learned.

And I've been talking ever since.

Talked my way right out of that miserable job, unhappy relationship, financial fears ... and more.

Our words create our world.

Are you paying attention to what you're saying? Are you choosing your words deliberately? Are you talking about what you want?

When you do that, especially when you talk about what you want as if you already have it - miracles happen.

What are you creating with your words today?

To this day, I don't get out of the shower without thanking angels in advance for what I want as if it were already here. Shower is a safe place to speak it out loud so no one thinks you're crazy. Plus, doing it with gratitude - that's a good vibe. And then you add the water element, which amplifies energy - that's a powerful practice.

I highly recommend it. :)

"I Secreted It ... "

Yesterday I met a new girl at the salon who asked what I did for a living. I told her I was a life coach specializing in the Law of Attraction, and asked if she'd heard of "The Secret."

Oh boy, had she heard of it!

The tone in her answer clued me in that she wasn't a fan.

She said doesn't believe in it. At least not fully. (She added that last part in an effort to minimize offense.)

She went on to explain that she used the Secret to get pregnant, but still had three miscarriages. So it didn't work for her at all.

Despite the fact that she was seven months pregnant as she told this story (happily expecting to deliver a healthy boy in mid-December), and despite the fact that she said she used the Secret to get pregnant (versus give birth) - four times no less! - she was steadfast in her belief that the Secret didn't work.

Her exact words: "I Secreted it and it didn't work." (I enjoyed hearing the Secret as a verb!)

I also njoyed not feeling compelled to point out the fairly obvious contradiction in her experience and belief. And I thought how odd that the very same situation is proof for one person it doesn't work and proof for another it does.

We each do truly get what we think.

I think it works, and I see in her situation the proof of it. She thinks it doesn't work, and sees in her situation the proof of it.

We really are each creating our own little world, huh?!

I offer this story as an opportunity for each of us to examine where a new perspective might serve us better.

My tried and true neighbor gave me such an opportunity this morning. A mobile vet I’ve never used before arrived to euthanize my 18 year old cat, Shadow, and mistakenly parked in the neighbor’s driveway instead of mine. My neighbor came raging out of his house with expletives afire about how he couldn’t park there.

As I met this new vet I learned he just arrived from Iowa, and has only been in Utah a few months. One of the nicest guys you’ll ever meet. “Good people” is what my father-in-law would call him. And here he is getting a greeting like that from my neighbor. I was mortified.

And angry.

Which I caught on to pretty quick. As you know, I have much experience with the “angry at my neighbor vibe,” which I’m purposely deactivating. So I found my way to a new perspective fairly quickly.

After apologizing to my new vet friend and explaining that the neighbor’s on crack and isn’t in charge of his behavior, I realized my neighbor probably has very few things in life he can control. Who parks in his driveway is likely one of them.

We all know how good it isn’t to feel powerless, and when a stranger’s parked in your driveway, that’s likely to activate “powerless.” I can see that.

So, with those thoughts in mind, I can cut him some slack. I’ve probably been mad at someone blocking my driveway a time or two. He and I aren’t that different, I remind myself. And that feels better.

Plus, I’m probably feeling a little powerless myself as I have to say goodbye to my Shadow. So .. it’s easy to see how “powerless” would show up in my world.

And then I remind myself we’re far from powerless. We’re creating all of this! And when I practice managing my feelings, I’m creating the kind of live that makes it all worthwhile.

Pray Rain in Action

As promised, here's the story of my first experience with a pray rain journal.

I was in the corporate world and had just gotten out of a staff meeting where we salespeople were told if we didn't turn our numbers around FAST, we were out of jobs. They'd pull the plug on the whole department.

Nothing was going right in the year the department had been up and running. I'd been on board four months and from day one was immersed in the struggle to make something good happen. We were having miserable results. No internal cooperation, our product wasn't well-received, and management had this pool of amazing 401k experts COLD CALLING prospects to try to sell this thing. It was ridiculous!

And it wasn't working.

So coming out of that meeting, I felt like I'd been fired. I thought, well, what they told us to do hasn't worked (cold calling, script sheets, etc.) so I may as well try something new.

And I thought about a pray rain journal. I'd heard of it, but never practiced it.

I knew a hairstylist who'd achieved her dream of owning her own salon by using a pray rain journal, so I had reason to believe it could work.

I also knew I didn't have a lot of time to get results, so I needed a very short journal.

Guess what I found in my drawer? A little 25 page $0.88 notebook - maybe 2" wide by 3" long - I mean TEENY. I could whip through that thing pretty fast. Didn't know if it'd be fast enough to save my job, but - it was worth a shot. After all, nothing else was working!

So I pulled out my new notebook, and on the first page I wrote about how excited prospects were to find me. I wrote about how much they loved my product. I wrote about what great instant rapport we had, and how they couldn't wait for me to implement the product, and how perfect it was for their company.

It was pure fantasy! Everything I wrote in there was the exact opposite of what I'd been experiencing.

But for those four minutes it took to write a handful of sentences about what I wanted as if I already had it, I was vibrating alignment with it. (And we all know that's where the magic is.)

So after my first entry I did another unheard of thing. I asked myself what felt good to do next.

"Lunch."

I hadn't had lunch since my first day on the job when the big wigs took me out.

I'd been eating Snickers and Grandma's cookies from the vending machine because we were under immense pressure to make a certain number of phone calls every day and track our results, and report back to management, etc. etc.

So after asking what felt good, I did something different. I went across the street (whoa - left the building! ha ha!) and ate my favorite Greek food at an outside table on a gorgeous spring day. I kicked my feet up on another chair and leisurely fed leftover pita bread to the sparrows. I goofed off. And it felt GOOOOOD!

After an hour and a half of enjoying myself and the beautiful day and the amazing food and friendly birds, I went back to the office. I was feeling refreshed. And better.

In the elevator on the way up, a gentleman asked me who I was. I told him my name and the company I worked for.

When I told him I sold small business 401k plans, his mouth dropped open. "You HAVE to follow me to my office." Which is where he showed me his desk - covered with sales literature from 401k vendors.

"I've been going through this for weeks and haven't been able to make heads or tails of any of it. Can you help me?"

Ha ha!

Can I help him?! It's only what I was born to do!! I mean, in truth, I LOVED 401k plans, I loved talking about them, I loved helping people understand them, I loved helping them figure out what would work best for them.

I finally got to do what I LOVED!

I had my satchel with me and pulled out my sales literature. We had a very nice chat.

After 15 minutes he got up and walked me down the hall to his HR Director. "Sherry, meet Jeannette. Jeannette, meet Sherry." He tells Sherry I'll be implementing their new plan and to sign whatever I need her to sign.

He turns to me and asks "How soon can you get that to us?"

I was more than a little shocked, you can imagine. Where were the objections? Where was the dance to try to get a second appointment? Where were the other decision makers who I had to get on board?

This was supposed to be a six week process to even get to the point where we prepare contracts for signature.

From that day on, I became a pray rain journal junkie. I mean, I didn't even have to get to the end of the BOOK before my first dream came true ... it happened before the end of the DAY!

I've used them on various things ever since. (Building my ideal coach practice in amazingly short time, for one.)

Have fun with yours.

And I just want to officially say thank you, Universe, for being so good to me. That was a really good day. : )

Pray Rain Magic

Karen at Live the Power recently featured a manifesting technique I shared with her called pray rain journaling. I didn't realize how many people didn't already know about this, so I thought a post devoted to the topic would be helpful.

Then I thought an e-book would be even better.

It's my hands down favorite manifesting technique, and when you read about it, you'll understand why!

What We Resist

Yesterday afternoon I thought some of us might get a kick out of this story. My girlfriend was selling shoes at the Greek Festival this weekend and I offered to help her man the booth.

She has an amazing array of shoes, the kind you can't help but ooh and ahh over. Nothing practical here - it's all glitter and glam. From flats to pumps to clogs to wedges to boots and sandals - she has it all. Some were sparkly, some had lacy straps, some were made of shiny satin, some had such pointy heels they were an engineering wonder - and honestly, you can't help but touch them. They're just fun!

She had one particularly appealing pair of shoes with fur trim that made everyone smile when they saw them. Most passersby would stop, look, laugh and then actually pet them. (Especially the men - go figure!)

I thought it was cute and a good draw; my girlfriend was annoyed that people were handling her merchandise.

So she made up a "PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH!" sign and just as she placed it next to the irrestistible fur-trimmed shoe, two women approached with a yellow lab by their side.

You know me, as soon as a dog is on the scene, I forget everything else.

But pretty soon I was smiling to realize the law of attraction was proving itself in quick action once again. This was a seeing-eye dog for one of the ladies, whose owner promptly began shopping by handling every shoe on display while her friend described the colors to her.

I had to laugh that as soon my girlfriend took action to stop people from touching her merchandise (resistance), she attracted a situation that delivered more of what she didn't want.

She wasn't really in a mood for an LOA lesson, I thought, so I was proud to not say anything. Well, to her anyway. I knew the rest of us would get a kick out of it!

And of course, I realize she's mirroring exactly what many of us do every day without realizing it. She knows how this stuff works - so do we. Yet how often do we unconsciously slip into "resist" mode?

Not that I would encourage us to look for resistance, since we get what we look for. But maybe a good focus is on what we're allowing, and where we have more opportunities to relax and flow, and on a greater level.

With that said I'm going to go "flow" an article for my editor. Happy day, everyone!

Choosing a Good-Time Filter

Every week the dogs and I go hiking with my dear dad. His favorite trail (Mueller Park - shown here) has crazy bushes along the way that create nasty stickers for dogs. My ex won't even walk it. He says it's not worth the trouble of pulling out stickers from coats for several days.

Plus there's an abundance of deer and rabbits the dogs love to chase. And (I imagine) it'd be easy for them to get lost on this mountain.

So when Sadie or Joe launch an off-trail adventure, I'm not super encouraging of it. (That's my indirect way of saying I yell at them to get their butts back here.)

Last week Joe went off trail for quite a while. So long that I thought I lost him. There was a lot of hollering that day. I was unusually hot. He jeopardized our good time by risking getting lost?! What a Stinker with a capital S! (Indeed it was an s-word I used, but it might not have been "stinker.")

Anyway, as we're wrapping up this morning's hike, dad says, "I noticed Joe didn't get in any trouble today."

I realized he was right. There was no yelling, no hollering, no waiting. Joe was a very good boy today.

As I start to acknowledge agreement, dad says, "And it didn't seem like he did anything different."

Wait, what does he mean by THAT?

Of course Joe was different, because there wasn't any trouble or hollering or MIA dogs.

I think about it, and realize Joe did go on an off trail adventure today. He was gone for a while - twice even! But I didn't worry about him this time. I trusted he'd find his way back to us and all would be well. No yelling today.

Dad is not a master of subtlety. However, I realize today he is making a gentle point that we went on the same hike we always go on, this time there was no trouble. The difference was me.

Same Joe, same off trail adventures. No trouble.

Different Jeannette.

So the trick for a more enjoyable walk with the dogs doesn't have to do with dogs listening better. It has to do with ME and my CHOICES of how to be on this walk.

I can worry, or I can trust and enjoy. It's so much nicer for everyone when I trust and enjoy. I know this stuff - why aren't I practicing it more?!

Tonight I wonder where else I might spoil my potential good time by worrying instead of trusting and enjoying.

Well, I see it a lot more of it than I would have guessed. I thought I was the Good Time Queen! And now I see how I spoil my Friday night with Russ by fretting that he's not off the golf course till 8, which is too late for dinner, too late for a movie, too late for fun.

Uh huh.

I see that instead of being able to laugh at watching my ex and his dad try to re-trap nine feral bunnies (seriously, two Elmer Fudds lurking behind bushes with fishing nets and traps with carrots set on the trigger - classic humor!), I worry what fate might befall the bunnies if they're not relocated.

I see that I could have more purposefully enjoyed four kitties growing up in my house if I wasn't carrying the tendency to notice the absence of the two who didn't make it.

No change in situation. Just a change in my perception, my response, my vibration. Makes all the difference in the world.

Wow!! What ELSE can I change??

Okay, I'm liking this ... instead of being regretful about all the work that didn't get done this week, I could relax and know the important stuff got done and enjoy my accomplishments. Maybe even look forward to the next week, instead of feeling behind for it.

Instead of being annoyed with dad for pointing out that I'm the only good time spoiler on the hike, I could be grateful for seeing it myself now.

My perception. That's the difference.

The good time is always there. The only question is which filter am I using? Am I filtering for a good time, or filtering for a bad time? I'll find either one I look for. Universe is very accommodating that way.

Here's to a good time filter for all of us who desire it this (stateside Labor Day) weekend! Namaste.

No One Wants to Win the Lottery

This weekend my sweetie participated in two events at his employer's Corporate Games. As regular readers know, my boyfriend likes to win - not just play, not just compete - he wants to be #1.

His experience reminded me of the question people often ask in terms of how law of attraction works when people want the same thing but only one can win. Like a lottery, a job or even a girl.

If each competitor wants to win and they're each vibrating "win," how could everyone get what they want?

This could be a long post, but I'm shooting for short & sweet.

Whoever is in closest vibrational alignment to winning will do so. But just because you're competing to win doesn't necessarily mean you're vibrating "win." Your energy could be "want to win" or "wish I could win" or "what if I don't win" or "hope I don't lose" or even just "do my best."

Vibrating "win" with clarity and confidence is easier said than done. And truly, Universe is pretty creative in delivering to us exactly what we're vibrating, as Russ experienced.

Before I continue, though, let me say it's important to drill down to what we really want. It isn't usually as simple as "win."

Example: I don't think anyone truly wants to win the lottery. I suspect what they really want is a higher quality of life, to be free from financial worries, support loved ones better, etc. And sometimes that happens as a lottery winner; sometimes it doesn't. Getting clear on what you genuinely desire is crucial to achieving it.

Someone who thinks he wants to "win over" a particular person probably isn't seeing things clearly either. What he really wants is more likely the feelings he thinks being in relationship with that person would give him.

We often miss the real target.

Back to my sweetie's story: for these corporate games there were many competitors who wanted to take home the gold, Russ included.

When he came home Saturday with a gold medal for bowling, he was pleased but nonchalant. Turns out what he really wanted was TWO gold medals. Especially the one for golf, where the competition was steep. That would mean more to him.

He just phoned to report that he also won the gold in the golf competition. Was he satisfied with his two gold medals now? Not remotely.

Turns out there was a three way tie on the golf course. Instead of conducting a playoff, they awarded gold medals to all three four-person teams. So 11 other guys are carrying around the same gold medal my sweetie is. He felt a little ripped off.

Not at all what he imagined having two gold medals would feel like.

What he really wanted was probably something more like acknowledgement that he's the best. I'm sure if he'd walked away with the gold by default because no one else showed up or were disqualified due to violation of stupid rules, he wouldn't have been satisfied.

Aren't we funny?!

Last night I watched a portion of the girls gymnastic national competition trials on tv. One competitor wanted to defend her title as champion; another just wanted to make the national team; another was quite pleased at evidence she was the national favorite; another wanted to do her best and make her parents proud, another young one wanted to gain experience for future high level competitions.

It was easy to see how each of them could get what they wanted, and still not be the "winner."

In fact, the girl who scored the highest was talked about as being very relaxed, having a good time and clearly enjoying her performances. Not a surprise, huh?

My point: 1) it's worth getting clear about what you really want and vibrating that, and 2) don't underestimate the Universe's ability to deliver on it. Apparently they make extra gold medals just in case. :)